My mother and I watch Castle:

(Beckett and her partner question a man in a coffee shop)
Mom: Oh, come on!  (laughing) “Let’s interrogate someone about a triple-secret (laughing so hard she can barely speak), confidential FBI case – in a COFFEE SHOP!  How PERFECT!”  It’s INSANE!!
Me: I’ve never seen you like this.
Mom: I bet it was a PUMPKIN SPICE LATTE!!



My mother and I watch Castle:

Mom, googling: It would be easier to find information about it if people weren’t naming all of their stupid bands Kill Switch.  Maybe I’m the only one who knows about it.
Me: *That’s* likely.
Mom, to the cat: Dakota knows, now.  We’ll have to kill her.


My mother and I watch Castle:

(A bad guy passes out in the middle of abducting Castle)
Mom: He must have had a kill switch.
Me: A what?
Mom: A kill switch.  So they can kill him when they’re done with him.
Me: Who’s “they”?
Mom: How do you not know this?
You’ve lived such a protected life.