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My mother re-watches Lord of the Rings in her head:

Mom, driving: You know, that was what ruined Lord of the Rings for me.  Viggo Mortensen’s hair was filthy and greasy for that whole movie.  He even fell into a river – you think that would have helped.  At least he washed it for his wedding.
Me: His wife made him clean up?
Mom: She was an elf.  She led by example.

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